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How do you see you?

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I am a fixer ( the Go to guy) cum researcher.
My super power is welfare and cooking .
Outside work and church I would be on the road 366 days of the 365 in a year.
There is something about moving and travelling that is pure joy.
I am a chess player, an upcoming skyline / landscape phone photographer (@b4best on Instagram).
I like seeing plans come to life.

 Christmas some years ago I met a guy in one of this church mingling things ( I feel a particular way about these things) and this was how I described myself.
Fast forward two years down the line and my opinion of myself has been weathered by the storms of the turbulent things that happen in a work space, life and growing up.
I catch the first glimpse of hope when I decide to go to the blueprint of how.
Worst case scenario, they will give me seven steps to being a woman ( If it ever existed).

As i walk into the meeting area i see people in their lock up mode all tense and wondering like me what they will find. Its scary knowing yourself for 30 years and knowing you don't know yourself and someone says they want to discover the "real you". The need for adventure makes me vulnerable enough to stand in that place and say "show me, me".

We begin with all shades of woman in attendance. Even though we have tall, short, dark, fair, put together, barely stringing along, one thing that rang true like an unwritten code across us all is we really wanted to know,
                        who really am I?
Like an initiation ceremony the mike goes round the room and everyone delivers their own portion of their makeup, some with highlights that can drown flood light bulbs, white power enough to create a plaster of Paris cast and the rest of us loosening our botox from the plastic surgery we did at birth to align with being a perfect child, daughter and wife.
Along with the microphone, goes the tissue. All the promise of waterproof mascara didn't start a match for the torrent of tears. For some of us the tears were therapy too, so tissue would have made the medication a little ineffective.
I didn't know what to expect but for some reason I had been reflecting because i didn't want to spend my Saturday sorting out the laundry basket i could sorted last week. Even with this I wasn't ready.
As I continue my journey of self discovery, I will evolve in ways i didn't know possible and in place I didn't know existed.
Armed with my pen and my dreams. I look forward to discovering who really is me?
Even I am yet to see.❤💗

If you are blessed to have the opportunity to go please don't go. Wait for someone to explain what it feels like. Continue being a relic, museums have a gate fee, we need a place to take our children to for field trips.👅


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